No Title. Oh Wait...

As you have seen from the title, I really don't have anything to talk about here. This might just be a very well constructed set of ramblings. But who knows? Maybe this post will be nicely formatted and such.

I have a question for you people. Yeah, that's right. I'm calling all you readers out there, you people. Frankly, I'm only calling you that because I haven't decided, yet, what you all are. This may cause problems later, but for now, we'll ignore that.

I'm trying to keep each paragraph at three lines each now. It started out as a cool coincidence but now it is a really weird pattern. I hope that no one is offended by this. I'm really just trying to make this post seem more organized than it is.

I just realized that I ignored my question I asked in the second paragraph. It was a question that had to do with the justification of these posts. Are you okay with it? If you prefer the way that papers are usually typed in, I might just change back.

Well we've made our streak of three line paragraphs go up to four. I don't know if this paragraph is going to meet the previous standards set by the earlier paragraphs. This might be a dogfight to the very end. I'm excited.

Woooo! We made it! Okay, that may not have been the most exciting thing you have read. Come to think of it, this should not be that entertaining for you to read. I am obligated to remind you that you can stop reading at any time. It's your call.

You know how in poetry, there is a name for poems that have stanzas that are all the same lengths? Does this count? I know this is not exactly poetry, but is there a name for something like this? That would be something to learn about.

I found out someone wrote a Master's Degree Thesis on parking lots. This came up while my people were searching for the inventor of the parking lot. I feel that that person could  be doing something a lot more exciting than essays on that.

At the time that I am writing this, there is snow on the ground.Can you guess the month? It's the end of March. You know how March is supposed to go in like a lion and out like a lamb? There only seem to be about two days that are "lamby."

Girl Scout Cookies: Why are they only offered for a limited amount of time? Is that to increase the demand? It's like having prohibition only during daylight savings time, you're going to get a bunch of bootleg Girl Scout Cookies.

China just overtook Germany in the international viewership of this blog. Sorry Germany, it was fun while it lasted. I really don't know much about China, so I'm going to learn as much as I can to appeal to the new audience here.

Well it is that time again. You know, that time where I end the post. It was fun writing in this style. It really made me choose my words carefully. I should challenge myself like this in other situations, like basketball: only 10 3's per game.

The Daumenator has rambled

Standards

I almost had that one where there was not going to be a title and everything would in chaos. Okay, maybe not chaos, but close enough for my standards.

Speaking of standards, there are many. These include standard deviation, the gold standard, standard temperature and pressure, and so much more. There is even an insurance company called The Standard (Doesn't that make you think of a company's standards? Hey, what are The Standard's standards?). Well there is Wikipedia page on standards. It is as follows:

Standard may refer to:

Flags

• Any flag, a piece of woven cloth used for signalling or identification
• any War flag or military standard
• Ensign, a distinguishing flag of a ship or a military unit
• Heraldic standard, a type of flag containing heraldic devices and used for personal identification
• historically any field sign
• Vexilloid or "flag-like" field signs

Automotive

American cars

• Standard (1904 automobile) (1904-1906)
• Standard (1912 automobile) (1912-1923)
• Standard Six (1909-1910)
• Standard Steam Car (1920-1921)

British cars

• Standard Motor Company (1903-1963), an English car and aircraft manufacturer

German cars

• Standard (1911 automobile) (1911-1912)
• Standard (1933 automobile) (1933-1935, 1950-1954)

Other

• Standard (Italian automobile) (1906-1908)
• Standard (Indian automobile) (1957-1987), mostly based on the British Standard cars (see above)

Car parts

• Standard transmission, see Manual transmission

Other businesses

• American Standard Companies, Inc., a global provider of air conditioning systems and services, bath and kitchen products, and vehicle control systems
• Standard Hotel, a hotel chain originating in Los Angeles
• Standard Oil (1863-1911), a large integrated oil producing, transporting, refining, and marketing organization
• Standard Talking Machine Company, an early twentieth century record label

Geographic locations

• Standard, Illinois, United States
• Standard City, Illinois, United States
• Standard, Alberta, Canada

Linguistics

• Standard language, a particular variety of a language that has been given either legal or quasi-legal status

Mathematics

• Standard algorithms, long-taught methods of computation such as long division
• Standard deviation, a statistical measure of variation
• Standard score, a statistics term
• Standardized rate, a statistical measure of any rates in a population
• Standard Young tableaux, a type of combinatorial object

Military

• A type of battleship, first seen in the 1912 Nevada class battleship.
• Standard missile
• Standard operating procedure, an established method of accomplishing a task
• Defense standard

Music

• Standard (music), the most popular and enduring songs from a particular genre or style
• Jazz standards
• Pop standards
• Blues standards
• Adult standards, a radio format that includes jazz and pop standards
• Standards (Tortoise album)
• Standards (Lee Morgan album)
• Standards (Jarrett album)
• "Standards", a song by The Jam from the album This Is the Modern World
• The Standard (band), an American indie rock band

Newspapers

• The Standard, a business newspaper in Hong Kong
• De Standaard, a Belgian newspaper
• Der Standard, an Austrian newspaper
• Dunoon Observer and Argyllshire Standard, a Scottish newspaper
• The Standard (Kenya), a Kenyan newspaper
• The Standard (Argentina), an Argentinian newspaper published in Buenos Aires published from 1861 until 1959
• The Weekly Standard, an American neoconservative magazine, sometimes abbreviated as The Standard
• Evening Standard, a London newspaper
• Standard (magazine), a defunct Serbian magazine
• St. Catharines Standard, a St. Catharines, Ontario, newspaper

Norm or requirement

• Breed standard (also called bench standard) in animal fancy and animal husbandry
• Technical standard, an established norm or requirement about technical systems
• International standard, standards suitable for worldwide use
• Open standard, a standard that is publicly available
• Standards organization, an entity primarily concerned with maintaining standards
• Standardization, the process of establishing technical standards
• Standard (metrology), an object that bears a defined relationship to a unit of measure (length, mass, volume, electric potential, and others) used for calibration of measuring devices
• De facto standard, product or system with market dominance
• Internet standard, a specification ratified as an open standard by the Internet Engineering Task Force
• Learning Standards, standards applied to education content
• Standard of care, the degree of prudence and caution required of an individual who is under a duty of care

Other

• Gold standard, a monetary system in which the standard economic unit of account is a fixed weight of gold
• Standard Baku, an Azeri association football team
• Standard cell, a building block for electronic integrated circuits
• Standard displacement, a naval term describing the weight and status of a warship
• Standard Liège, a Belgian association football team that is often abbreviated as Standard
• Standard solution (Chemistry) , a solution of known concentration.
• Standard (warez), rules for public release of pirated materials

The Daumenator has standards

"Funny" Skits

This was a skit that my den put on when I was a boy scout. I hope that you like it as I liked being the scout that was attacked:

Two campers are walking through the woods. They come to a campsite and realize they only have a one person tent. With a little bit of bickering, they decide who will sleep in the tent and who will sleep on the ground. 

s1 - Scout in the tent

s2 - Scout on the ground 

Both scouts get comfortable and fall asleep.

Four more scouts (unseen to the audience and positioned one in each direction (north, south, east, & west)) call out: 

North: "From the North"

South: "From the South"

East: "From the East"

West: "And from the West"

All Four: "We're the Blue Trolls!" (loudly)

All Four Trolls rush in from their respective directions and beat up the scout sleeping on the ground. As swift as the came, they then return to their spots.

The bewildered scout runs to the scout in the tent (who was unaware of the Blue Trolls attack) and yells

"A monster", "I was just attacked by a grueling, vicious, horrifying creature," etc. He pleads that he should have the tent and the other scout should try sleeping on the ground.

The Scout in the tent tries to comfort the scared scout and assures him that there are no "creatures" out there.

Both scouts go to sleep again. 

The same episode is repeated where the Blue Trolls call out, rush up, beat up the scout on the ground, and leave.

Again the scout is histerical and pleads again to switch places with the scout in the tent.

(it is optional to repeat this once more if time is allowed) 

The scout in the tent, a bit upset now and wanting to get at least a little sleep, agreed to sleep outside.

Again the same episode with the Blue Trolls is repeated. Except this time as they are rushing up and just as they are in mid-swing, one of them says "Wait, we've gotten this guy enough, let's get the guy in the tent!" And they then proceed to pound the unfortunate scout in the tent.

Didn't see that ending coming, did you? After this, I found on the internet at eHow.com how to write some funny skits. Here they are:

Bubble Gum

• The only props needed for the hilarious Bubble Gum skit are a chair and a piece of gum. Person No. 1 walks to the chair at the front of the stage, takes a piece of gum from his mouth and sticks it on the back of the chair. Then he walks away. Person No. 2 walks to the chair and leans on its back. He realizes the gum is on his hand and is disgusted. He wipes the gum on the seat of the chair and walks away. Person No. 3 enters and sits on the chair. He gets up and realizes the gum is stuck to his butt. He peels it off in disgust, throws it on the ground, and walks off. Person No. 4 enters and steps on the gum. He realizes what has happened, peels the gum off his shoe, and sticks it to the back of the chair. Person No. 1 re-enters, pulls the gum off the back of the chair, and puts it in his mouth. As he walks away, the audience explodes into laughter.

Gotta Go Wee!

• Everyone in the skit lies on the floor in a line, pretending to sleep. This skit can have as many people as you want. The last person in the line says, "I gotta go wee!" Each scout repeats the request all the way down the line to the "leader" at the other end. The leader asks, "Can you hold it?" Then every person repeats the question all the way down the line to the end again. The person on the end says again, "I really gotta go wee!" Repeat passing the requests down the line two or three times. Then when the message gets to the last person again, he gets up and runs around the stage yelling, "Wee!"

Romeo and Juliet

• A funny script is great to follow for a school talent show skit. Have the actors dress as the characters from Shakespeare's "Romeo and Juliet." Juliet should speak seriously and confidently. When Romeo recites his lines, he should randomly stop and say, "What?" Someone backstage then yells the meaning of the line in modern terms. This can be quite funny with the right exaggeration and acting.

How dare they give ideas like that! I was never a fan of eHow anyway. They seem to have very vague instructions for some things like how to get your foot out of a bear trap.

The Daumenator has spoken

My Dream Factory

Factory: a building or set of buildings with facilities for manufacturing

Now some of you may associate factories with pollution and evil. Well in this segment of J Town, I will take you on a journey through what is known as my dream factory that will change your opinions of factories today.

Aspect #1: The sounds of Disneyland are pumped into the factory

Those types of sounds are the sounds of pure joy. If an employee is working to the sounds (and possibly smells) of Disneyland, they are almost guaranteed (which is the same as saying, "not guaranteed") to be approximately 53% happier than workers with the factory without those soothing sounds.


Aspect #2: The things we manufacture will only be in bright colors
Everyone can imagine that dark and dreary factory with its dull colors and think, "Ugh, that place is so dark and dreary. I wouldn't want to work there." But in my factory, the bright colors of our products will light up the room and give illuminating ideas to everyone who is in that factory.


Aspect #3: We will hire children to run around laughing
Hey, that child is laughing in that factory, that must be a fun place to be. Exactly. People will see the working children having fun and just being themselves and will want to have something to do with our factory. At this point, you must be thinking, "Did he just say, 'Our factory?' Well yes I did. You see, if you you want to become part of this great entrepreneurial experience, you can. I just have to get to know you a little better.


Aspect #4: Instead of yes we say "affirmative!"
Okay, I might have just stolen that line from a Flight of the Conchords song (Robots), but it is definitely something to consider for a dream factory. "Hey, Steve. Did you remember to make those copies?" "Affirmative, sir." People have gotten so used to saying yes that they have now gone back to the contraction of "yessir" and have not really been feeling the meaning behind that phrase. With "affirmative" people will have a better vocabulary and will respond with more politeness.


My Dream Factory is only a figment of my imagination for now. I must admit, I do not know a whole lot about how factories should be run. With your help, I could put the idea of a dream factory in motion. Step one should probably to figure out what we even are making (besides happiness).

The Daumenator has spoken