The Septemer Holidays

I've recently looked at the fact that September doesn't have any major holidays that are widely celebrated. Sure there's Labor Day, but where's the Labor Day elf? There's no Labor Day songs or mascots. There isn't even a little sign that says "Go Labor!" Besides, September is the only month without a major holiday:
January ~ New Year's Day
February ~ Valentine's Day
March ~ The Ides of March/March Madness
April ~ April Fool's Day & Earth Day/Administrative Professionals Day
May ~ Cinco De Mayo & Mayonnaise Day
June ~ End of the School Year
July ~ The Fourth of July
August ~ The month was named after Augustus Caesar, who loved to party
September
October ~ Halloween
November ~ Thanksgiving
December ~ Getmas/ St. Nicholas Day

But I have found a couple unofficial month names for September:

• Baby Safety Month
• Better Breakfast Month
• Cable TV Month
• Children's Eye Health and Safety Month
• Library Card Sign-up Month
• National Chicken Month
• National Courtesy Month
• National Honey Month
• National Pediculosis Prevention Month
• National Piano Month
• National Rice Month
• National School Success Month
• National Sewing Month
• Read-A-New-Book Month
• Women of Achievement Month

Here also the weeks of September:

1. Child Injury Prevention Week
2. International Housekeepers Week
3. National Farm Animal Awareness Week
4. National Roller Skating Week

But these are terrible holidays! I suggest that we insert a couple of holidays like Wombat Day. There's Groundhog Day, but there are no sentimental feelings for wombats in the United States. We need to spread appreciation for the lesser known animals. We could also have Smash-Your-Finger-With-A-Hammer-Day. Come on, everyone does it. Let's just make the burden easier and have it planned each year so we know when to expect our fingers to hurt. But if you have any ideas about how to improve your September, let me know.

The Daumenator has Septemberized

What's a vector?

What's a vector? I have no idea. But I do now. For I have traveled to the lands of Merriam-Webster and found out the meaning of vector:

1. A quantity that has magnitude and direction and that is commonly represented by a directed line segment whose length represents the magnitude and whose orientation in space represents the direction; broadly : an element of a vector space b : a course or compass direction especially of an airplane.

2. An organism (as an insect) that transmits a pathogen.

3. An agent (as a plasmid or virus) that contains or carries modified genetic material (as recombinant DNA) and can be used to introduce exogenous genes into the genome of an organism.

There also apparently is a video game alligator named Vector. He wears headphones all the time so I'll let him pass. The color version of the picture was too scary to be shown on a public blog.

The Daumenator has spoken

Theodore Roosevelt vs. Chuck Norris

This is where we pit some of the two toughest men in history against each other. But we won't do any of those fancy virtual simulation things. No. We're going to give each of their qualities an analyzation. Let the battle begin!


Facial Hair

TR: Has one of those Iron Will mustaches. Closely resembles a walrus mustache. And you don't want to mess with a walrus do you? Legend has it that TR's mustache once got some mayonnaise on it. The mayonnaise proceeded to clean itself of because of fear.


CN: Has a scruffy beard and mustache. Oh yeah, just like a rebel. It has that kind of, "I've killed people with this beard kind" of look. A myth about the beard is, "There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist." That's one crafty beard to cover up something like that.

EDGE: Chuck Norris

Deals

Neither of these men have been on Deal or No Deal. If they were they'd get the million dollar case right away.

TR: Created the Square Deal. It consisted of a deal to coal miners. He then would punch you square in the jaw if you objected.

CN: Has the Round Deal. Disagree with him during the deal, and you get a Roundhouse kick to the back of your face.

Edge: Theodore Roosevelt

Losses

TR: In the Presidential race of 1910, Teddy lost the Republican party nomination to the overweight, copycat of TR, William Howard Taft. Taft won that year, but by the next election, TR created the Bull moose party. Which diverted all votes from the Republican part and gave them to Woodrow Wilson.

CN: In the movie "The Way Of The Dragon" Chuck Norris Dies. Chuck Norris vs. Bruce Lee

Edge: Theodore Roosevelt

Reputations

TR: Teddy always had reputation for being stern. An example of this is when he tossed Eleanor Roosevelt into a riveer in order to teach her how to swim. He also had a son named Kermit. His sterness got him through the entire building of the Panama Canal all by himself. He caught yellow fever down there but guffawed it off.

CN: Chuck has a reputation of creating death wherever he walks by punching and roundhouse kicking all now extinct species.(They were Do-do's because they messed with him)

Edge: Chuck Norris

Impersonations

Chuck Norris resembles a lion always catching its prey.

Theodore resembles the 26th president you don't want to mess with.

Edge: I can't criticize this, impersonations are an opinion thing

Facts

TR: (as written in the book (including capitializations))

• Caught up in the spiritualism craze of the early twentieth century, Roosevelt participated in more than thirty seances - AS THE TABLE.
• Roosevelt began every day by wrestling his entire cabinet and throwing them out the window. He accidently killed Secretary of War Elihu Root this way.
• When offered the "Presidential Option" to cover up any murder inthe White House, he GUFFAWED MIGHTILY and insisted that he could easily bring Root back to life VIA STRENUOUS EXERCISE AND BLACK MAGIC.
• HE WAS RIGHT!
• When rejected by the mainstream Republican Party, Roosevelt created the "BULL MOOSE" Party. Initially only moose were allowed to join, as Roosevelt admired their solid, stubborn natureand their hatred of trusts.
• LATER, PARTY MEMBERSHIP WOULD BE OPEN TO ANYONE WHO COULD GROW ANTLERS.
• Only JANE ADDAMS could manage it!
• TR's daughter, the spirited Alice, would regularily strangle ponies for the delight of the White House Press Corps. WHO DO YOU THINK TAUGHT HER THAT TRICK?
• The "Teddy Bear" was named after Teddy Roosevelt because of his LOVE OF BEAR MEAT and the fact that he was covered in fur.
• Teddy Roosevelt had a HOOK FOR A HAND. But then, you already knew this.
• Roosevelt once had a presidential aide who was suffering from thedreaded disease tuberculosis. TR organized a staring contest and STARED THE TB RIGHT OUT OF HIM.
• Together, TR and his son, Kermit, explored Brazil's River of Doubt. When they were done with it, it was renamed THE RIVER OF UNQUESTIONABLE CERTAINTY.
• TR named his son Kermit. THAT SHOWED HIM!
• Roosevelt died fighting an old lion and was buried in Mount Rushmore, WHERE HIS GIGANTIC, FOSSILIZEDFACE STILL STARES OUT OVER THE COUNTRY HE BEAT INTO SHAPE THIS VERY DAY.

CN: (Taken from a website)

• If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
• There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
• Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
• Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
• Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
• Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
• Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
• Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
• When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
• Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
• Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Edge: You Decide

The Daumenator has spoken

House Tigers

You've seen them. Well maybe not in real life, but maybe in the movies. The point is, up until now, House Tigers have not been as popular as they should be. I mean they're cute, cuddly, and if you play your cards right, you could be hosting a mock Seigfried and Roy show in your living room/Tiger Chamber. I mean it's fool proof!

+

=

I mean, who doesn't like tigers on couches? They symbolize relaxation. And if you can relax on your own couch with a hungry tiger right next to you, you are one relaxed person. I mean tigers are intense creatures to play fetch with. Just look at the picture below if you don't believe me:

YOU DO NOT WANT TO GET IN THE WAY OF HIS TREAT!

But I believe house tigers should be more involved in society. You will force Congress to get something done if you put an angry tiger in the room and don't take him out till a bill is passed. But house tigers can be so cute and fluffy. Just look at how they prance in the snow:

So I cast a vote for house tigers, do you?
The Daumenator has spoken

The Stuff You May Have Not Heard Of

I know what you're thinking. "It's that doodad thingy! But what is it called? I wish I knew someone who could tell me what that's called!" Well I was thinking the same thing. Turns out nobody knew what it was called. Even the percussion people in a high school band didn't know. Well the Vibra-Slap (yes, it's hyphenated) or the Mandible has confused many people. I mean, how does it make that sound? Well എ metal teeth inside the wooden block rotate to create that unique sound due to someon hitting the ball on one end. Also known as the MACHINE GUN COWBELL!

How to Play a Vibraslap

Please drink responsibly

There was a commercial one day. It talked about germs and all the things that could come from tap water. It then proceeded to say ,"Please drink responsibly." There can only be one explanation. Brita water filters must contain some kind of alcohol. Otherwise, there wopuldn't be a need to drink it responsibly.

Note: I have now figured out how to put my top 11 into music. I have also put my current 20 most recently played on the blog as well. Go crazy.

I need to come up with a way to explain how the third person works without the person thinking, "I'm not three people. But if myself talks like that, he will be the third person." Because that's exactly what happened the other day. I'm not going to name names but the same person also asked what a Dove Bar is. (His/Her name rhymes with Splate) Now for those who could figure out who that is, you're thinking, "How could he/she say that? He/She is an ice cream connoisseur! Well he/she was not at fault. He/She thought we said, "Doug Bar." He/She began asking questions like, "Where are these Doug Bars? Who makes them? Are they tasty? Are they made of Doug? I've only heard of Haggen Dazs (?)" Well it was a sad day. The Doug Bar had been forgotten about. But here are a few pictures of Doug's Bar:

Let's go party there!

Also, did you know Snuffelufagus was invisible to everyone but Big Bird, on Sesame Street for a while? I didn't. Major changes were made when Doug the cartoon show on Nickelodeon changed to Disney. Instead of having eight hairs on his head, Doug had a growth spurt and had nine hairs.

The Daumenator has spoken

Let's Try This Out

Okay. This is what I do on some of my totally free time. There is this new feature I've been looking at. It is the translater that can turn the words you say into these following languages:

Hindi
Kannada
Malayalam
Tamil
Telugu

Now of course all of these languages don't have letters so that's what the translator is there for.

But I'm very leery of all of this. Because I don't know how it all works yet. So technically this post will probably be published a numerous amount of times until all of the signs of me screwing up are gone.

But I am curious. I was trying to see if this whole post could be translated. I don't think there is a Hindi word for Jonas Brothers. But I am going to try this out.

Vacationing in Cuba is best when you have a gallon of watermelon-flavored sand.
It is ranked number 1109 of places to go to taste the food only. (Scotland being
#1 for it's Haggis) The Watermelon flavored sand is an accidental food though.
Why? Well it's because of the parrots. Parrots are not indigenous to
Cuba. This means that when they shed their feathers, they leave a
devastating impact on the ground. Especially sand. Sand reacts to parrots like
television to newspaper. It's pretty weird. Anyway, watermelon-flavored sand is
still something to not eat.

This is now going to be in Hindi

वाकाशनिंग इन क्यूबा इस बेस्ट व्हेन यू हवे अ गल्लों ऑफ़ वातेर्मेलों-फ्लावोरेड सनद. आईटी इस रंकेद नम्बर ११०९ ऑफ़ प्लेसेस तो गो तो तसते थे फ़ूड ओनली. (स्कोत्लंद बीइंग #१ फॉर आईटी'स हग्गिस) थे वातेर्मेलों फ्लावोरेड सनद इस अन अच्सिदेंतल फ़ूड थौघ. वही? वेल आईटी'स बेकाउसे ऑफ़ थे पर्रोट्स. पर्रोट्स अरे नोट इन्दिगेनोउस तो क्यूबा. थिस मेंस ठाट व्हेन थे शेड ठिर फेअठेर्स, थे लीव अ देवास्तातिंग इम्पक्ट ओं थे ग्राउंड. एस्पेसिअल्ली सनद. सनद रेअक्ट्स तो पर्रोट्स लिखे टेलिविज़न तो नेवसपपेर. आईटी'स प्रेत्टी वेइर्द. अन्य्वय, वातेर्मेलों-फ्लावोरेड सनद इस स्टील सोमेथिंग तो नोट एअत.

Malayalam

വകാറേനിംഗ് ഇന്‍ ക്യൂബ ഈസ്‌ ബെസ്റ്റ് വ്തെന്‍ യു ഹാവ് എ ഗല്ലോന്‍ ഓഫ് വാറെര്‍മെലോന്‍-ഫ്ലാവോരെദ്‌ സന്ദ. ഇറ്റ്‌ ഈസ്‌ രണ്കെദ്‌ നമ്പര്‍ ൧൧൦൯ ഓഫ് പ്ലസ്സ്‌ ടോ ഗോ ടോ ടേസ്റ്റ് ദി ഫുഡ്‌ ഒണ്‍ലി. (സ്കോത്ലന്ദ്‌ ബിംഗ് #൧ ഫോര്‍ ഇറ്റ്‌'സ ഹഗ്ഗിസ്‌) ദി വാറെര്‍മെലോന്‍ ഫ്ലാവോരെദ്‌ സന്ദ ഈസ്‌ ആന്‍ അച്സിടെന്ടല്‍ ഫുഡ്‌ തൌഗ്ത്. വൈ? വെല്‍ ഇറ്റ്‌'സ ബെചൌസ് ഓഫ് ദി പര്രോത്സ്. പര്രോത്സ് ആരെ നോട ഇന്ടിങേനൌസ് ടോ ക്യൂബ. ദിസ്‌ മീന്‍സ്‌ ദാറ്റ്‌ വ്തെന്‍ ദേ ഷെഡ്‌ തെഇര്‍ ഫീതെര്സ്‌, ദേ ലീവ് എ ടെവസ്റ്റിംഗ് ഇമ്പച്റ്റ്‌ ഓണ്‍ ദി ഗ്രൌണ്ട്. ഏസ്പെകിഅല്ല്യ് സന്ദ. സന്ദ രീക്ട്സ് ടോ പര്രോത്സ് ലൈക്‌ ടെലിവിഷന്‍ ടോ നയൂസ്പപേര്‍. ഇറ്റ്‌'സ പ്രേട്ടി വെഇര്ദ്. അന്യ്വായ്‌, വാറെര്‍മെലോന്‍-ഫ്ലാവോരെദ്‌ സന്ദ ഈസ്‌ സ്റ്റില്‍ സോമെതിംഗ് ടോ നോട ഏറ്റ്‌.

Hope the Hindi works!

The Daumenator has spoken

The Fact That It Is jdtown.blogspot.com

Okay, because This blog is called J Town, you'd think the URL would be jtown.blogspot.com. But NO. The reason why is, the URL in question was already taken. I never really bothered to check out who took it until today. It's a ditched blog! Seriously! It has only one post. And when was this post? The one and only post was posted on May 2002. And also, the blog has nothing to do with J Town. It's called Marvin's Room. And there are some mispellings in it too. What is wrong with Marvin? Click on the Title of this post to view Marvin's Room.

The Daumenator has spoken

Jonas Brothers Girlfriends

I went to an official Jonas Brothers website and took girlfriend tests with my sister. We compromised on answers. But this is what we got.

So officially we are most compatible with Kevin Jonas. He was already officially my favorite. Why? Because my sister hated him the most so he automatically has to be my favorite.

To take these girlfriend quizzes, go to The Jonas Brothers Fan Wiki

It's in the middle of the page and it is the third line down.

You also might want to check this out. It

The Daumenator has taken the test, can you?

The Water Horse

It was a movie. Did anyone see it? I sure did. If I didn't I wouldn't really know what I would be talking about it. I'd probably give fake reviews. There were two "professional" people who gave reviews based off of whether they were hot or not hot. They weren't that in depth though. One of there reviews went like this:

"We haven't seen the movie yet but based on the previews, it
looks HOT!"


Now the movie in question here: "The Water Horse" is about the legend of the Loch Ness Monster. It starts out with little Scottish lad by the name of Angus. (Just like the beef) He finds this rock near the Loch and "wabaam!" It's a water horse egg! Only the trick is, he doesn't know it's an egg until it hatches. When it does hatch he is shocked I mean surprised. I'm pretty sure he peed his pants but that is another mystery of Scotland. The first flaw of the movie is when he names it. Now knowing the Scottish people, it has to be automatically crazy. It is. The water horse's name is Crusoe. Okay, that's acceptable with the whole water thing and all but the flaw is whenever Angus says the name. Every single time he says "Crissot" or some variation of it. This is the part that had me extremely confused because In the beginning of the movie, some crazy American tourists came and asked this old guy about it and he was all like, "Oh you mean Crusoe." He pronounced it very correctly so you knew it from him but Angus kept screwing it up.


"I'm his only friend, I saved his life."
Well after being two days old, the Water Horse didn't have much time to socialize with everybody in Scotland. So he had no choice but to say yes to being the friend of Angus. But Angus didn't really save his life. If you look at the picture on the left, you can see that the area wasn't that dangerous. If anything, Angus almost killed the Water Horse


"I'll never forget you."
What monster? Oh that one. Sorry, I got him confused with the other magical monsters that I've raised all by myself. I almost forgot about him. Near the end of the movie, young Angus says this to Crissone memorable Water Horse. Very sad time indeed. But how could you forget something like this?


"It's a German U-Boat! Attack!"
Date: 1940's. At this time, German Untersee Boats (Not Misspelled) were menacing. When I mean menacing, they were menacing.The Scottish people live in fear of the Germans because of these boats. The quote above was said by the leader of the heavy artillery section on the Loch Ness. But lets be realistic. Boats have to be in the water in order to go places. But how would a giant submarine get to a landlocked lake? Wouldn't someone notice it was odd when the Germans snuck into Scotland and snuck onto a small lake? And why? Why would the Germans want to go to a practically unknown lake in Scotland? Crazy Scottish people.

There also is a snobby captain who believes Angus needs to be disciplined so Angus is forced to do all of the work of at least two soldiers. The mom is also quite snobby ever since the father dies. The handyman names Lewis Moobly is also quite a character. At first when the mom of the house calls him Mr. Lewis he insists on being called Mr. Moobly. This goes on for four times in a row. Until he's called Mr. Moobly and then he insists on being called Mr. Lewis. Gar!

The Daumenator has remembered Croissant

May

I realized that I had no posts for May.

Here it is.

The Daumenator has spoken

Butlers (Indeed)

Haven't you ever wanted to say, "Butler!" and actually have a real butler come to you? Well I have. Butler's seem to be in a high class though. Higher than the people they serve. Have you ever noticed that? Butlers are like ninjas. They come from a special academy. Yeah that's right, academy. School is not an appropriate word. In fact, it is the International Butler Academy. Ooh! Hoy Peloi! Some even wear Ascot Ties. Ascot Ties! Ascot Ties! That's fancy with a ph! (Phancy) Indeed! They get to say words like indeed, affirmative, and kumquats! The official (accent on the "a") mission (accent on the "o") statement of the International Butler Academy is:

Our mission is to promote the butling and the private service profession by
training dedicated individuals in becoming professionals in the art of
butling and house management. The International Butler Academy provides its
graduates with the best possible qualifications for entering the private service
profession. We offer you superb training, enabling you an introduction
into a career which should last a lifetime. Our graduates can be
employed by employers anywhere in the world.

What a bunch of stuck up people! Indeed! Henceforth! Fish and Chips! (a.k.a. Crisps).

Now what else make these Butlers so fancy? Well lets look at what they wear! They wear Ascot Ties, Tuxedos, Shoes, Racing/Riding/Slapping Gloves, and most importantly pants. The nerve.

But I'd love to have a Butler. Maybe even more than one. My first Butler would be my name butler. He'd walk into the room where I am and say, "Butler reporting for butler duties, Sir." And that would be all. I might have a food butler, snack butler, chips butler (a special gift it is to handle chips), a shoe-throwing butler (throws the shoe), a shoe-catching butler, a dinner butler, and a supper butler. I'd get my own water.

The Daumenator has called for his butler

Happy Earth Day!

Earth Day was first celebrated on April 22, 1970, and has been growing strong ever since. Here’s a look back at our Earth Day roots.

20 Million: Number of people who celebrated the first Earth Day

200 Million: Number of people who celebrated Earth Day in 1990

500 Million: Number of people who celebrated Earth Day in 2000

175: Number of countries worldwide that celebrate a designated Earth Day

4,390,000: Number of Google hits for Earth Day

37,100,000: Number of Google hits for Green Day

On many school calendars, it is the third most activity-inspiring holiday, after Christmas and Halloween.

Earth Day was founded by a senator of Wisconsin and the day is credited for creating the environmentalism movement.

April 22 is the first official day of Spring in the Northern hemisphere and of Fall in the Southern hemisphere and was chosen to be Earth Day for this reason.

A highlight of the annual Earth Day ceremony at the United Nations is the ringing of the Peace Bell that was given to the UN by Japan. It is made from coins given by school children to further peace on our planet.

The department's 15th annual Earth Day celebration will be held on Friday, April 24, 2009, from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m at the Missouri State Capitol south lawn.

The Department of Natural Resources sponsors and hosts the event at the Capitol each year.

Activities include information booths, games and displays about the environment. Many other state and federal agencies participate through educational displays and exhibits.

Activities for the event are tailored to fifth-graders, but all ages are welcome.

The department’s Earth Day celebration is targeted towards students but the event is also open to the general public.

Approximately 10 other state and federal agencies are expected to participate.

2009 registrations are ongoing.

Sources:
http://www.plentymag.com/features/2008/04/by_the_numbers.php
http://www.parents.com/fun/parties/special-occasions/fun-facts-about-earth-day/

http://www.yumsugar.com/219708

http://www.dnr.mo.gov/earthday/facts.htm

On a side note: According to my crazy calender, April 22 is also Admministraative Proofesionals Day. All I can say about this is, "How lame!" Who wants to celebrate having administrative professionals in our lives? It's like saying, "Thank yoou for putting up so much red tape for us to go through every daain our lives. We just love thse restrictions!" Also, they had to put on the same day as another holiday? Couldn't they have moved it to April 21 where nothing was going on? Going green is better than Administrators going black and white! And last time I checked, There are lot better holidays than A.P. Day. Like on August 31, it's National Trail Mix Day. And on January 13, it's International Skeptics Day. Beat that Administrative Professionals.

There also are two other holidays on April 22. They are Girl Scout Leader Day and National Jelly Bean Day. Still much better than Administrative Professionals (a.k.a. "Secretaries").

The Daumenator has spoken

Dyngus Day

What the cheese is Dyngus Day? I know but you all probably don't know.

Historically a Polish-American tradition, Dyngus Day celebrates the
end of the often restrictive observance of lent and the joy of Easter. Over
the decades, Dyngus Day has become a wonderful holiday to celebrate
Polish-American culture, heritage and traditions.

How fascinating! Here is some more information:

There are many stories that attempt to explain the origins of the day. Many
Polish customs date back to pre-Christian practices of our Slavic ancestors. The
custom of pouring water is an ancient spring rite of cleansing, purification,
and fertility. The same is true of the complimentary practice of switching with
pussy willow branches. Since 966 A.D., Dyngus Day has been associated with
the baptism of Prince Mieszko I. Tradition states that Prince Mieszko I along
with his court were baptized on Easter Monday. Thus, Dyngus Day and its rites of
sprinkling with water have become a folk celebration in thanksgiving for the
fact that the first king of Poland was baptized into Christianity, bringing
Catholicism to Poland. In more modern times, the tradition continued when farm
boys in Poland wanted to attract notice from the girls of their choice. It was
custom to throw water and hit the girls on their legs with twigs or
pussywillows. Cologne was used instead of water by the more gallant
lads. The ladies would reciprocate by throwing dishes & crockery and
Tuesday was their day of revenge, imitating the same tactics.

WHERE IS DYNGUS DAY CELEBRATED? Buffalo, New York is officially the
Dyngus Capital of America with the largest concentration of festival locations
and live polka music. Smaller festivals can be found in community
with sizable Polish-America populations such as South Bend, Indiana,
Chicago, Illinois, Elizabeth, New Jersey, Bristol, Connecticut
and Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Celebrations in South Bend kick off political
campaign season in the City.

HOW TO CELEBRATE DYNGUS DAY? As the popular polka anthem explains,
“Everybody’s Polish On Dyngus Day!” Many parties begin during the mid-morning on
the Monday after Easter with a large buffet of traditional Easter foods
(kielbasa, ham, fresh breads, eggs). It is common to hear polka music on Dyngus
Day with the mandatory dancing of at least one polka. Many parties continue well
into daylight on Tuesday. (A tip to the first time Dyngus participant….take
Tuesday off from work.)

PUSSYWILLOWS OR WATER? This is a yearly debate among
Dyngus Day revelers. The tradition holds true that on Easter Monday boys
would sprinkle the girls with water and tap them with
pussywillows. On Easter Tuesday, the women would return
the favorite. At modern Dyngus Day parties it is common practice
that both men and women trade water and pussywillow equally.

Another Holiday on April 13 is Blame Someone Else Day and Scrabble Day.

The Daumenator has spoken

Rock, Paper, __________.

What would you fill in the blank? Some of you "squares" would put in "scissors". What a bunch of quitters. "Creativity rewards the one who is creative," said Mr. Brown. So let's be creative! we can come up with loads of stuff to fill in the blanks! Here are a few of my suggestions:

• Rock, Paper, Gizzards: If you don't know this, Gizzards are your intestines. Get hip with it yo! It's called slang! This is a very offensive move where you attack or try to attack the other person's Gizzards.
  




• Rock, Paper, Lizards: Not many people like lizards attacking them, so this is effective in creeping out the opposition. Extra toungue flicking helps.
  




• Rock, Paper, Wizards: In honor of Harry Potter, you may use any spell that you kan think off except for Avada Kedavra because that would just be mean. If in one of your spells you turn your opponent into a newt, walk away because you've just won.





• Rock, Paper, Chainsaw: Very Effective. Why? well you wouldn't wantto mess with a chainsaw would you?
  




• Rock, Paper, Super Rock: Super Rock would beat most things, except for:




• Rock, Paper, Distraction (Then punch): While your opponent is looking for the non-existent distraction, you must punch them in the Gizzards and then hit them with a Super Rock and a little Expecto Patronum. Game Over.

The Daumenator has spoken

Blogging for Dough

So the other day I was fiddlin' around because that's what I do (I fiddle), and I noticed that I could "Monetize" my blog. Hey, I'm easily fascinated with words like monetized so I click on this little tab to learn more about it. Guess what: I can get paid to put advertisements on here. Here's what you apparently do:

1. You click on where it says you want to put your advertisements. It could be either below each blog post or under each little doohickey on the right side or both. This probably shows how much advertisements you get and maybe how much you get paid.


2. You need to have an "AdSense" account. (Yes, it is spelled that way) Either you already have it or you don't. If you don't know what the heck AdSense is then you don't have one. So if you don't have one, then you click on "create an AdSense account." You now should be hitting your first snag.


3. The majority of the people who blog don't have some thing called "Cookies." The screen will tell you right away that "Cookies is not enabled." Well this is a problem. Because now I have to enable "Cookies." Here are the steps that Microsoft has given to tell the average person how to get cookies (besides going to get Oreos):

To edit your Microsoft Internet Explorer preferences, please follow these steps:

1. From the Tools menu, choose Internet Options.


2. To update your cookies setting, click on the Privacy tab.


3. Click the Default button or move the slider to a setting below 'Block All Cookies.'


4. Then, to enable SSL, select the Advanced tab.


5. Scroll down to the Security section and select
   the checkboxes marked 'Use SSL 2.0' and 'Use SSL 3.0'.


6. Click OK.

My favorite part where they tell you to block all cookies. I can't tell you more because some "illegal" issues got in the way of my investigations. Anyway that's all I wanted to say.

But how about those podcasts?

Some of you may be asking, "what the breadstick are podcasts?" Well I'll tell you.

Podcasts are... Whoa! I don't know how to explain them!

Let's bring in a little Webster's Dictionary:

Podcast: a program (as of music or talk) made available in digital format for automatic download over the Internet

Well that clears up a lot of things. So now I've been a little more technologically friendly over the years. For instance, I've created this blog. How cool is that? I've also become a Grand Master Wizard on Microsoft Powerpoint. You never saw the next slide comin'. But I've also gotten to know more about podcasts. Most of them are free on iTunes (99%). But if you're going to listen to podcasts, listen to these:

• NPR: Wait, Wait... Don't Tell Me! (If you want news and humor, especially humor)


• WNYC: Radio Lab (If you want research)


• This American Life (if you just want to hear weird stories)


• All Songs Considered (If you want to hear new and fresh songs and host Bob Boilen rush through all of his words like they are going off of a conveyor belt at full speed)

Special things about them:

Some podacasts have a long list of podcasts that hey have recently released into the world. Some are good and some are not so good. But when it comes to "Radio Lab" there are some really good podcasts you should hear. It's hosted by two guys by the names of Jad Abumrad and Robert Krulwich Here's my list (in order from best to worst so far):

1. 11/18/2008: "Choice" ~ This is about choice and how the brain works. There are many case studies and is very interesting information. Good background music.
2. 5/29/2007: "Time" ~ This starts out with a day-long version of a very famous song that is so extremely slowed down that it sounds like it's a whale. It also explains a perception of time.
3. 8/13/2007: "Morality" ~ This one also explains choices and why our brains act the way they do. starts out with a very interesting question.
4. 4/22/2008: "Pop Music" ~ Explores why songs get stuck in your head. Also explains the writing process of a certain famous song ("Downtown").
5. 3/9/2009: "Mischel's Marshmallows" ~ Interesting and scary. This was a childhood ttest that Mischel conducted to see results about patience and will power. It goes more in depth than you think.

As for "Wait, Wait... Don't Tell Me!" They are all good so listen to what ever one's you get.

The Daumenator has spoken and suggested

The Latest Words of the Day

One of my New Year's Resolutions was to strengthen my vocabulary. I'm actuallyy fulfilling that. Every day I get a "Word of the Day" e-mail from Merriam-Webster's official dictionary website. There are some okay words like "scratch" and "Wherefore." But sometimes there are the wackiest of words. Here is a list of some of my favorite:

1/16/09 Foible: 1: The part of a sword or foil blade between the middle and point

2: A minor flaw or shortcoming in character or behavior : weakness

1/19/09 Maudlin: 1: Drunk enough to be emotionally silly

2: Weakly and effusively sentimental

1/28/09 Primogeniture: 1: The state of being the firstborn of the children of the same parents

2: An exclusive right of inheritance belonging to the eldest son

2/2/09 Cyberpunk: 1: Science fiction dealing with future urban societies dominated by computer technology

2: An opportunistic computer hacker

2/3/09 Unreconstructed: Not reconciled to some political, economic, or social change; also : holding stubbornly to a particular belief, view, place, or style

2/12/09 Slumgullion: A meat stew

2/14/09 Spoony: 1: Silly, foolish; especially : Unduly sentimental

2: Being sentimentally in love

2/21/09 Fugleman: One at the head or forefront of a group or movement

3/9/09 Pooh-bah: 1: A person holding many public or private offices

2: A person in high position or of great influence

3/13/09 Flibbertigibbet: A silly flighty person

3/17/09 Blarney: 1: Skillful flattery : Blandishment

2: Nonsense, humbug

That's all the words I have for now. Thank you for reading.

The Daumenator has spoken

Quote of the Month (April)

Okay. This is so much trickier than I thought it would be. But let's cut to the chase.

I can't come up with a quote of the Month for April

This may shock you but I actually pre-plan this thing. I usually have a quote all ready to go about two weeks from the first day of eaach month. But this time, it's not happening. So I've decided to bring it to a vote. You can submit some quotes and then about a week before I will arrange them into a poll and then we will vote on them all to see which is the champ quote for April.

Please come up with excellent quotes. Not schmucky ones.

The Daumenator has spoken

The Card of the Week

As you may have noticed, there is a certain box called "Card of the Week." For those of you who have seen it, good for you, you can observe well! For those of you that haven't, look at the top of the page underneath the "Quote of the Month" right now. You'll probably see it.

Some of you may be asking,"why is that there?" Well I'll tell you why. It is because I've just recently noticed that there are 52 weeks in the year and 52 cards in a standard poker deck. I just wanted to glorify each card with it's one week of fame before it "dies." (temporarily)

The first ceremonious card is the Queen of Clubs. (Yes, I've shuffled the deck)

If you have any problems with this change, sort it out amongst yourselves. I don't want to hear your problems.

The Daumenator has spoken

Happy Square Root Day!

Did you know it was Square Root Day today? Neither did I until about 10 minutes ago when somebody made fun of me for not knowing about a holiday that about 5% of the world has heard of. A Square Root Day is very uncommon because they only happen about 10 times a century. Sadly it's an unofficial holiday but here is an explanation of it:

Square Root Day is an unofficial holiday celebrated on days when both the day of the month and the month are the square root of the last two digits of the year.

It was first celebrated by Ron Gordon who was a California High School Teacher. He first celebrated Square Root Day on September 9, 1981 (9x9=81). He is the official publicist of Square Root Day and his daughter created a Facebook group (Whatever that is, I don't know. I personally boycott Facebook). Ron Gordon wanted to encourage this holiday and he himself wanted everyone to:

"One suggested way of celebrating the holiday is by eating square radishes, or other root vegetables cut into shapes with square cross sections (thus creating a "square root")"

He also has a contest every Square Root Day. The winner of this contest this year gets $339.


These Square Root Days are occurring regularly every century. For those of you who are not Mathematically inclined Her is a list of Square Root Days to come:

• 1/1/01
  
• 2/2/04
  
• 3/3/09
  
• 4/4/16
  
• 5/5/25
  
• 6/6/36
  
• 7/7/49
  
• 8/8/64
  
• 9/9/81
  

10/10/100 would also be a square root day. The year 2100 is actually the last year of the 21st century.



Fun Fact: A cool trick to these days is that the years are separated by consecutive odd numbers. (3,5,7,9,11,13,15, and 17) This illustrates the fact that every odd number is the difference two consecutive squares. How Squaralicious!


This was "borrowed" from the Oakland Tribune:

So it's just a day like any other. There is a chance, however, of winning a few bucks. Gordon, who is the day's official public-relations man and sent press releases to media outlets around the world, and whose daughter is hosting a Square Root Day cyber event on Facebook, is running a little contest to find the most people involved in a Square Root Day celebration, such as getting a bunch of people to form a human square-root symbol.

Prizes will be divvied up out of a total of $339. And it's not too late to enter. You have approximately 339 hours from now (until 3 a.m. on March 18). Send your entry photos or descriptions to rgordon@seq.org, or mail them to Ron Gordon at P.O. Box 5133, Redwood City, Calif., 94063, but don't address it in square root — the post office hates that.

And some are more alluring than others, Gordon said. He notes that 2004's Square Root Day fell on Groundhog Day, which won't happen again for 95 years. For that occasion, Gordon honored the day by cutting root vegetables, such as carrots and radishes, into squares and sending them via FedEx to Punxsutawney Phil, the weather-forecasting groundhog. Phil's handlers later said he did nibble on them a bit. He likes a square meal. (Daumenator here. This totatlly reminds me of the other Phil in the movie "Groundhog Day." I keep thinking it's the same one but it's not. Anyway that was one crazy groundhog. He reminds me of the gopher in "Caddyshack." Funny Bill Murray was the actor playing both of those characters trying to kill them in each of those movies. Weird)

Gordon's celebratory ideas are great, but feel free to observe that day in your own special way. Maybe research your genealogy — you know, getting to know your roots. Play four square. Visit your hairdresser and touch up your roots. Be square: Listen to a Pat Boone record and don't drink or smoke. Perhaps skip the root canal, unless of course it's a must.

Oh, and nerds, don't forget Odd Day, when the three odd numbers appear in their correct order on the calendar: May 7, 2009. And of course Pi Day comes up next week on March 14. Then — for super nerds only — there's Mole Day. No, it's not Groundhog Day, and it's not until Oct. 23 at 6:02 a.m. or p.m., in which the numbers of the time and date mimic Avogadro's number (6.02 x 10 to the 23rd power) which is a basic measuring unit in chemistry. Thank you, OxiClean man.

Now this got me interested in something called Mole Day. Now according to Wikipedia (which is more credible than World Book):

Mole Day is an unofficial holiday celebrated among chemists in North America on October 23, between 6:02 AM and 6:02 PM, making the date 6:02 10/23 in the American style of writing dates. The time and date are derived from the Avogadro constant, which is approximately 6.02×1023, defining the number of particles (atoms or molecules) in a mole, one of the seven base SI units.

Mole Day originated in an article in The Science Teacher in the early 1980s. Inspired by this article, Maurice Oehler, now a retired high school chemistry teacher from Prairie du Chien, Wisconsin, founded the National Mole Day Foundation (NMDF) on May 15, 1991.

Many high schools around the United States and in Canada celebrate Mole Day as a way to get their students interested in chemistry, with various activities often related to chemistry or moles. Since 2007 Mole Day has been celebrated in Smålandsstenar/Sweden.

Some schools celebrate Mole Day on June 2 (6/02 in MM-DD format) and occasionally February 6 (6/02 in DD-MM format), rather than October 23 (10/23), presumably from 10:23 AM to 10:23 PM.

Some schools celebrate "Mole Week" around October 23.

The American Chemical Society sponsors National Chemistry Week, which occurs from the Sunday through Saturday during October in which the 23rd falls. This makes Mole Day an integral part of National Chemistry Week.

Now for those of you fools who were reading that one article and not knowing what Pi day was, I feel ashamed of you. But here is information on it anyway:

Pi Day and Pi Approximation Day are two holidays held to celebrate the mathematical constant π (pi). Pi Day is observed on March 14 (3/14 in ISO date format), due to π being roughly equal to 3.14. Pi Approximation Day is observed on July 22, due to π being roughly equal to 22/7.


Pi Minute is also sometimes celebrated on March 14 at 1:59 p.m. If π is truncated to seven decimal places, it becomes 3.1415926, making March 14 at 1:59:26 p.m., Pi Second (or sometimes March 14, 1592 at 6:53:58 a.m.).



The first Pi Day celebration was held at the San Francisco Exploratorium in 1988, with staff and public marching around one of its circular spaces, and then consuming fruit pies; the museum has since added pizza pies to its Pi Day menu. The founder of Pi Day was Larry Shaw, a now retired physicist at the Exploratorium who still helps out with the celebrations.



The Massachusetts Institute of Technology often mails out its acceptance letters to be delivered to prospective students on Pi Day.



Some also celebrate Pi Approximation Day in addition to Pi Day, which can fall on any of several dates:

• April 26: The Earth has traveled two radians of its orbit by this day (April 25th in leap years); thus the entire orbit divided by the distance traveled equals pi

• July 22: 22/7 in the more common day/month date format, an ancient approximation of pi

• November 10: The 314th day of the year (November 9 in leap years)

• December 21, 1:13 p.m.: The 355th day of the year (December 20 in leap years), celebrated at 1:13 for the Chinese approximation 355/113

Fast Fact: On Pi Day, 2004, Daniel Tammet calculated and recited 22514 decimal digits of pi.



Fast Fact: Albert Einstein was born on Pi Day, 1879. Alexander Graham Bell was born on Pi-Day in 1847.





The Daumenator has spoken